December Never Felt So Wrong...

Mood: exhausted
Hating: that I'm still nauseous...hopefully it's a 24 hour thing...
Loving: that winter break is almost here! Christmas is in ONE WEEK!
Currently lip-syncing: Sara Bareilles & Ingrid Michaelson -- Winter Song
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HUO0gd7cr9o&feature=related

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It's such a shock to realize that you're growing up. Remember when you were a kid, and you thought reaching 10 years old was a huge deal? You're in the double digits now! Yeah, whoop-dee-doo. When you hit three digits, let me know.

Today, I had to stay late at school to help run a rehearsal. Which normally wouldn't be a problem, but I felt so ill that it was just a trainwreck from start to finish. After that disaster, I ended up having to go out shopping with my sister. I had forgotten I promised her I would start our Christmas shopping today.

So feeling nauseous and shaking uncontrollably, I was dragged from store to store to store. If I didn't feel sick before, the massive amounts of people taking advantage of holiday hours and sales would have done the job. It's insane to see people fighting over little boxes of chocolate, just because they're 75% off (they were those expensive seashell belgium chocolate things, but still...). My sister was picking things off the shelves left and right, throwing them into a basket (or cart, depending on where we were), whereas I was plodding along slowly. Partly because I was feeling like crap, and partly because I like to think about the gifts I'm buying.

This year, I optted out of buying Christmas cards and little trinkets for everyone. I just found that last year, it was just unnecessary work. I'd rather hang out with the person than just hang them a card with a candy cane. Not to offend those who do, of course. But I've tried it. And I don't think it's for me. My sister was outraged, calling me lazy and selfish, not wanting to give people little red and green coloured pieces of cardboard.

On top of that, while I started buying gifts today, I caught myself actually doing some math. That's a big deal, if you know me. But that's not the scariest part. I was calculating how much I could spend, how long it would take me to pay back, and adding in when my bills and such were due. To add more, I was also thinking about my laundry that needed to be done, other errands (like filling up the car with gas, picking up some lettuce, etc.) and my next shift at work. When I realized what I was doing, I literally froze.

It's crazy now that I think about it. Somewhere further back, I became a job-working, bill-paying, hard-working young adult.


Wow. Never thought I'd see the day.